Cannot stand it.

1) Nobody fucks with me anymore. I'm going to fuck up the person who tries to do that. He will fucking regret it as his throat is slit and blood will gush out profusely. I will make sure his last thoughts are that of regret for fucking with me.

2) For all intents and purposes, I am alone. Many others can do so, no reason why I can't. I did not ask for sibling.

3) I am the only one who is capable of taking care of them in the future. Barring anything unfortunate (which nobody has power over), I am the one who will be shouldering the burden, and quite rightly so. So whatever I do now is simply a means to an end and criticism should be kept to a minimum.

4) Things have degenerated for whatever reason, I don't know. But if things are not brought back to the way they were before, or even better, what worked in the past may not happen again now. So better fucking make sure that there is a return to what previously worked, or even better.

5) My mistake for being at the wrong place at the wrong time.

About (1). Maybe an exaggeration. No point killing someone. But you get the idea what I want to do.

I rest my case. I will fight on. I WILL FUCKING FIGHT ON TO THE VERY END.

So, it has been quite some time since I last blogged.

Things are really heating up now. It will not be a walk in the park.

Things have been prioritised, and certain things carefully re-examined. I am being driven by necessity here.

I will reclaim my spot, the previous CT was a disgrace. I do not like it.

The best thing to do is just tune out of whatever is happening. I don't give a fuck because I know what is important. Just don't encroach into what is rightfully mine. Haha.

No doubt I've slipped into temporary depression. From Wikipedia, Depression is a state of low mood and aversion to activity that can affect a person's thoughts, behaviour, feelings and physical well-being.[1] It may include feelings of sadness, anxiety, emptiness, hopelessness, worthlessness, guilt, irritability, or restlessness. Depressed people may lose interest in activities that once were pleasurable, or suffer cognitive impairments (difficulty concentrating, remembering details, or making decisions). They may contemplate or attempt suicide. Their weight may change dramatically. Insomnia, excessive sleeping, fatigue, loss of energy, or aches, pains or digestive problems that are resistant to treatment may be present.[2] Depression can cause pervasive problems in an individual's life through its (often unconscious) changes to behaviour (e.g. a pygmalion effect of expecting poor social performance, and ultimately pushing people away). 80% of what is described in this applies now. You got to be fucking kidding me All that work, for nothing? As I recall all that I did, recall going to the interviews, recall doing the PI, EOM, InR, recall the weekly meetings to finish the WR... I am angry, what the fuck went wrong? Was it the OP? No, it cannot be. JUST WHAT IS IT? DAMN IT I WANT ANSWERS I WANT TO APPEAL BUT I'M TOLD NOT A SINGLE APPEAL HAS EVER BEEN SUCCESSFUL. NOT A SINGLE FUCKING ONE Get out of this quickly and move on BUT I NEED TO SHUT OUT ALL MEMORIES OF WHAT HAD BEEN DONE I CANNOT STAND IT I JUST WANT TO KILL WHATEVER IS RESPONSIBLE FOR THIS MYSELF? THE OP? WHAT THE FUCK?

Gave her a birthday present.. initially rejected but she did accept it in the end.. I have to be honest here, I may have given up for quite some time now, and while I can stop liking her in "that" way, there's always a soft spot. But moving on, really.

Amazing how many things have happened in such a short period of time. Wushu plan failed, time to go for SIG, CIP, Recre Badminton, Hissoc RMUN and stuff.

And driving test soon! 30th March hahaha! Soon I will be driving yeah.

Birthday coming soon